10 things you should know about Breaking up... female view

1. If someone is breaking up with you, it is because they don't want to be with you and they don't care as much about you anymore as they used to, hence the reason they are breaking up with you! Yes, being the person that is doing the breaking up does suck, but it is nowhere near as bad as being the person dumped, no matter how the dumper may feel!!
   
   
2. Granted, no-one likes to hurt another person, but you also have to do what is right for you, so if a relationship is not working, then you have to make the decision as to what you want to do, the longer you stay in a relationship that is not working and you know you could do something about it, the worse it is going to make both of you feel.
   
   
3. If someone breaks up with you and gives clear, concrete reasons why, then you can move on. If someone does not tell you the reason why, never assume that it is you. Lots of people get to a point in the lives where they need to be alone, so that is not a reflection on you. Listen to what the person is saying and try to be objective, I know, I know, this is very hard, but if you can take a step back, then you can save your inner voice beating you up and blaming you for something that is quite possibly not your fault.
   
   
4. Cry, scream, whatever it takes to vent out your emotions during a break up or afterwards, but always direct it at an object, not at the person... in the end, the reason we feel emotions is because we have allowed things to happen, even someone breaking up with us... we choose to be with them... just remember, everything happens for a reason, where are here to live, love and learn.
   
   
5. Breaking up is never easy, no matter which side you are coming from. But know one ever died from a broken heart, you will survive and life will move on, you just have to decide when you are ready to get back up and move forward. Take the time you need, but don't dwell too much, this can lead to depression and negative places... talk to family and friends and do things that make you happy. Avoid seeing the other person.
   
   
6. Be prepared that when you break up, one of you is going to find another partner, sometimes sooner than later and often the dumper is the one to find the new partner, as they are ready to move forward... this is one of the most difficult parts of a break up and there is nothing that can prepare you for it... the best advice I can give, don't allow the other person to know you are upset, be brave and do something to make you happy, visit a day spa, get pampered, whatever it takes to get you back on top of the world... and smile, you never know who might be falling in love with you :-)
   
   
7. Revenge is never an option, even if they cheat on you or do something equally disgusting... however, you can do things like write letters etc and burn them, so that you get those feelings out in the open. The best revenge is to never give that person your precious time... they are not worth it.
   
   
8. A big part of the pain of breaking up is rejection... this is probably the biggest emotion we feel. There is no point rushing out and sleeping with lots of people to make you feel better, because it will not, that is a 'quick fix'. Love yourself, accept who you are and the mistakes you may have made and move forward. Get a new haircut, join a dating agency, do whatever it takes to make you feel whole again, without replacing the person, because that just causes more issues further down the track!
   
   
9. Don't do the "if only..." Going over and over what you could have done, what might have been is self destructive, sure, go over the relationship and your part in it, but once you have learned your lessons, let it go, you cannot change a thing in the past, all you can do is live in the present and look to the future.
   
   
10. You never know what's just around the corner, life changes so quickly, one day you can be heartbroken, the next Mr Right walks into your life... don't you want to be ready for him?! You can get through this and you will.

The best advice I was ever given was from my Gran, she said "If the person you love breaks your heart, repair it yourself with your love and be prepared for the love of your life, because he will never break your heart, ever" right on Gran!

Take care
Mrs Handsome



href="http://technorati.com/tag/Breaking" rel="tag">Breaking, Up, Dumped, Upset, Hurt, Love