10 things you should know about Breaking up... female view

1. If someone is breaking up with you, it is because they don't want to be with you and they don't care as much about you anymore as they used to, hence the reason they are breaking up with you! Yes, being the person that is doing the breaking up does suck, but it is nowhere near as bad as being the person dumped, no matter how the dumper may feel!!
   
   
2. Granted, no-one likes to hurt another person, but you also have to do what is right for you, so if a relationship is not working, then you have to make the decision as to what you want to do, the longer you stay in a relationship that is not working and you know you could do something about it, the worse it is going to make both of you feel.
   
   
3. If someone breaks up with you and gives clear, concrete reasons why, then you can move on. If someone does not tell you the reason why, never assume that it is you. Lots of people get to a point in the lives where they need to be alone, so that is not a reflection on you. Listen to what the person is saying and try to be objective, I know, I know, this is very hard, but if you can take a step back, then you can save your inner voice beating you up and blaming you for something that is quite possibly not your fault.
   
   
4. Cry, scream, whatever it takes to vent out your emotions during a break up or afterwards, but always direct it at an object, not at the person... in the end, the reason we feel emotions is because we have allowed things to happen, even someone breaking up with us... we choose to be with them... just remember, everything happens for a reason, where are here to live, love and learn.
   
   
5. Breaking up is never easy, no matter which side you are coming from. But know one ever died from a broken heart, you will survive and life will move on, you just have to decide when you are ready to get back up and move forward. Take the time you need, but don't dwell too much, this can lead to depression and negative places... talk to family and friends and do things that make you happy. Avoid seeing the other person.
   
   
6. Be prepared that when you break up, one of you is going to find another partner, sometimes sooner than later and often the dumper is the one to find the new partner, as they are ready to move forward... this is one of the most difficult parts of a break up and there is nothing that can prepare you for it... the best advice I can give, don't allow the other person to know you are upset, be brave and do something to make you happy, visit a day spa, get pampered, whatever it takes to get you back on top of the world... and smile, you never know who might be falling in love with you :-)
   
   
7. Revenge is never an option, even if they cheat on you or do something equally disgusting... however, you can do things like write letters etc and burn them, so that you get those feelings out in the open. The best revenge is to never give that person your precious time... they are not worth it.
   
   
8. A big part of the pain of breaking up is rejection... this is probably the biggest emotion we feel. There is no point rushing out and sleeping with lots of people to make you feel better, because it will not, that is a 'quick fix'. Love yourself, accept who you are and the mistakes you may have made and move forward. Get a new haircut, join a dating agency, do whatever it takes to make you feel whole again, without replacing the person, because that just causes more issues further down the track!
   
   
9. Don't do the "if only..." Going over and over what you could have done, what might have been is self destructive, sure, go over the relationship and your part in it, but once you have learned your lessons, let it go, you cannot change a thing in the past, all you can do is live in the present and look to the future.
   
   
10. You never know what's just around the corner, life changes so quickly, one day you can be heartbroken, the next Mr Right walks into your life... don't you want to be ready for him?! You can get through this and you will.

The best advice I was ever given was from my Gran, she said "If the person you love breaks your heart, repair it yourself with your love and be prepared for the love of your life, because he will never break your heart, ever" right on Gran!

Take care
Mrs Handsome



href="http://technorati.com/tag/Breaking" rel="tag">Breaking, Up, Dumped, Upset, Hurt, Love

10 Things about Breaking Up...

Not sure that I agree with everything that is written in this article... it is written from a male point of view and being as how I am female, some of these things lack a little substance... I will be coming back with my 10 things in the next post. 

What are your thoughts on this article?  Post your comments below.

Take care

Mrs Handsome

1. More often than not, breaking up is as hard on the person ending the relationship as it is on the person being broken up with - don't assume just because a person is breaking up with you means that they no longer care about you, caring about you and wanting a relationship with you are not one and the same.
2. Nobody likes to hurt another person, especially somebody they have been close to, and it is often very easy to guilt trip somebody into staying with you when they are trying to end things. Resist this urge! When you use guilt as a way to stop a break up you not only cheat yourself out of having a good and true relationship, you foster resentment in the other person which could lead to greater pain and heart ache in the future.

10 Things You Oughta Know About... A Top 10 Fact Sheet on Breaking Up

technorati tags:Breaking, Up, Dumped, Upset, Hurt, Love

Breaking up...

When was the first time you were broken up with or did the breaking up?

The first memory I have is being in highschool, I was 15 and my then boyfriend was the same age, we had met through a recreation sport we did together and while our parents "suggested" it wasn't such a good idea that we go out, we ignored them and did. We were together for 5 months and then things just started going weird. I started pulling sulking stunts and he withdrew. The next thing I knew, he was on the phone one night after school, breaking up with me! I was devestated and having to deal with him at school was hard. The next day he made a point of saying hi to me, but I really wasn't in the mood for that.

Being a 15-year old female, just dumped, I was in no mood to play nice! So, what do you do when you have been dumped at the age of 15?! You start rumours of course! I can safely say, this is most definitely not the best way to handle a break up!

Did I get over it, I sure did, did I speak to him, not for a few years afterwards!! It sure made the recreational sport we shared awkward, but as they say... a woman scorned... hehe

Anyway, this is my very first break up. Nothing to spectacular, but very devestating at the time... I wonder if this was a warning of things to come in the following years...

Mrs Handsome

Handsome Returns... what does this mean?

Welcome, welcome, welcome...

This site is all about that dreaded moment in your life when the person you love the most decides that they don't feel the same way about you... Breaking up, being dumped, whatever you want to call it, it hurts and it sucks. Nothing anyone can say or do can make the pain go away... however, there are ways to "speed" up our recovering and that is what I am here to tell you all about!

I have plenty of experience in this department, which is a little sad, but hey, it is life and it just means that I have not met Mr Right or Mr Right Now or Mr Whatever... but I will.

So, stay tuned and read on to find out if any of the stories and tips on this site sound familiar to you and just maybe, you might find something that will help you to move forward.

Take care

Mrs Handsome!